Saucy is the sixth episode of the fifth series of Still Game.

Series Name
Season 5, Episode 6
Air date 26 July 2006
Written by Ford Kiernan and Greg Hemphill
Directed by Michael Hines
Episode Guide
All the Best
The Party


The episode opens in the Clansman where Jack and Victor are sad about Winston's recent departure to Finport. Boaby makes fun of them, but they throw it back at him. Chris the postie comes in with a postcard from Winston. They think it's strange that Winston doesn't put his address on any of the postcards. Just then, Tam comes in with Frances and his sister in-law, the singer Molly Drummond who has come to visit. Funnily enough, Molly now lives in Finport. Tam wangles a free round from Boaby by claiming that Molly played a show in New York where Frank Sinatra bought her a drink after the show.

Later, Victor receives a phone call from Winston who is still refusing to reveal his address. However, Victor is suspicious that Winston has asked how Boaby is. They decide that Winston is hating living in Finport, so they decide to visit to check up on him.

At Tam's house, it is revealed that Molly is just as tight-fisted as Tam is. Tam starts to have romantic feeilngs for his sister in-law.

Next morning, Jack and Victor decide to take the Citylink bus to Finport. Since they are a couple of pensioners who don't get to the coast very often, Jack and Victor plan to have Fish and Chips, a pint and an ice cream before they visit Winston. When they arrive at Finport, they find the place is run down and freezing cold. Jack and Victor decide to forget the ice cream, but soon find out that the chip shop is closed and doesn't re-open until May. When Jack and Victor get to the pub, the barman has run out of beer so they have two whiskeys instead. The barman warns them not to be wandering around Finport in the dark as the neds take over the town at nighttime. Instead, Jack and Victor book into a Bed and Breakfast ran by former Londoner Michael. As he is such a lonely man, Michael begs Jack and Victor to have a nightcap with him, but he has the cheek to charge them for the drink.

The following morning, Jack and Victor are served an inadequate breakfast by Michael. They then see Winston walking past the window. Before they can leave, they are stopped by Michael who demands his money. They pay Michael and leave. Meanwhile, back in Craiglang, Molly shows Tam how to get a freebie at the cafe by putting on a Marilyn Monroe act for pensioner Sandy's 80th birthday.

Jack and Victor soon meet Winston, who shows them what a day in Finport is like. Winston is pretending to enjoy himself, but Jack and Victor are highly suspicious. They follow Winston home from the bus. It soon becomes clear that Winston is not enjoying himself. Winston lives in a small bedsit and explains that he was offered sheltered housing, but turned it down. Jack and Victor decide that Winston is coming home to Craiglang, but pass the buck over who puts him up.

Before Molly goes on the bus home to Craiglang, Tam has to stand with her while Frances buys her a tea for the bus. Tam tells Molly that he no longer has any romantic feelings for her, as he is married to her sister. Molly returns the sentiment by grabbing Tam's balls.

Winston is about to board the bus back to Craiglang but not before shouting "Get it right round you, Finport!" The bus conductor goes to put Victor's case in the side of the bus, but is surprised to find Molly in there.

After the credits roll, the regulars of the Clansman welcome Winston back to Craiglang. Winston lets of a string of insults to Boaby, but justifies himself by saying he's been away six weeks.