Kill Wullie is the first episode of the fourth series of Still Game.
|Season 4, Episode 1|
|Air date||22 July 2005|
|Written by||Ford Kiernan and Greg Hemphill|
|Directed by||Michael Hines|
The episode opens with Jack going over to breakfast at Victor's house which turns out to be chocolate eclairs. Before Victor gets a chance to eat his eclair, Jack tells him he had an erection this morning. Victor is pleased for his friend and they discuss their fantasies of sex, when the doorbell goes. As Victor goes to answer the door, Jack eats Victor's eclair. It turns out that there is two neds with a tombola for the non-existant Craiglang Football Team, but Jack and Victor are not fooled and suss that the neds are looking for money for themselves. They set fire to the card and they run away.
Meanwhile, Isa is at the cafe for a cup of tea. She talks to Eric who comments about the new woman, named Rena. Eric says that Rena is a widow but is a beautiful woman. Isa doesn't think Rena looks attractive due to her large breasts. Jack and Victor arrive at the cafe with flowers and chocolates for Rena. Just then, an elderly man named Wullie comes in. Wullie starts hugging and kissing Rena, to the shock of his friends, Jack and Victor. Rena is about half the age of Wullie.
Winston is sitting in the waiting room of the hospital for his new prosthetic leg to replace his leg that was amputated at the end of series three. Winston tells a young man off for smoking, but the young man mocks Winston for missing a leg. Winston has the last laugh as he lets the door slam shut on the man's sore arm. The doctor tells Winston that there is a bit of a problem with his new leg.
Jack and Victor catch Fergie the ned still conning pensioners out of money. They scold Fergie for doing so and warn him that he will end up on a life of crime if he is not careful. They advice him to get a girlfriend. Fergie says he fancies Sinead, the younger woman who works in the cafe, but doesn't know how to chat her up. Jack and Victor tell Fergie to give her the young patter such as talking about playstation and rap music. Fergie thinks this is rubbish, but says he will chat Sinead up. Jack and Victor see Isa rushing off to Navid's, presumably to tell him the news about Wullie and Rena.
At Navid's, Jack and Victor try to tell Navid the news, but Isa gets there first. They wonder what the attraction is, but Isa believes that Rena is after Wullie's house. Just then, Wullie comes into the shop wearing a cycle helmet. Wullie asks Navid for condoms, but he gets laughed at by Jack, Victor and Navid.
In the Clansman, Tam is trying to get a free pint, as usual. After looking miserable, Eric feels obliged to buy Tam a pint and Tam steals Eric's mince and tatties. Winston comes in, followed by Jack and Victor. The lads are keen to see Winston's new foot and pressure him into showing it to them. Winston shows it to them and they burst out laughing.
It turns out that Winston's new leg is actually a woman's leg. Winston feels depressed because he feels he has become old and decrepit and fears his next leg will go. Jack and Victor console him and take him to the cafe to see Rena.
At the cafe, Rena and Wullie are still seeing each other. Wullie tells his friends that Rena has got him drinking Red Bull to keep him awake. Isa comes in and tells the lads that she believes that Rena means to kill Wullie in order to keep his house. Nobody believes Isa, and they think it's a big joke about Wullie and Rena's relationship. Fergie and Sinead are also kissing each other.
In the Clansman, the lads are still talking about Wullie and Rena. Jack thinks that Rena is only the daft woman from the cafe, but Boaby points out that Sweeney Todd was just a daft barber. The lads think death by sex is the way to go. Winston comes in and says that he would like to spend the last few days of his life waking up next to a dolly bird. Boaby jokes that Winston does that already with his woman's foot and says he should get a wig and a fake pair of breasts and he could shag himself to death. Winston cracks and violently throws his false leg at Boaby and then falls to the floor. He ends up being barred for his stunt.
Isa is trying to convince Navid that Rena is trying to kill Wullie, but Navid would rather listen to his iPod. However, his opinion changes when Rena comes into the shop and buys a bottle of white spirits, a large box of matches and a packet of Jammie Dodgers. Navid now believes Isa that Rena means to lure Wullie with a trail of Jammie Dogers, squirt the fluid over him and set him on fire.
Jack and Victor are walking home in a storm. They see Rena shutting the curtains and they wish Wullie luck. Meanwhile, Wullie is up on the roof, trying to fix the TV aerial. He ends up losing his balance and falls off the roof, making a crash below.
Isa wakes up Jack and Victor and shows them through the window that there is an ambulance and police outside Wullie's house. They go to the scene of the disaster. Isa shouts abuse about Rena, but the police officer tells them that Wullie has survived his fall through the greenhouse, but Rena has died. Rena came running down the stairs to help Wullie, but fell and broke her neck. Wullie is not badly injured, but he is heartbroken at Rena's death. However, he soon fancies the female paramedic.
After the credits roll, Jack and Victor meet Winston riding a bike (presumably with a new man's false leg). Fergie tries to con Winston out of money with the Craiglang Football Team tombola. Jack and Victor are annoyed, but Fergie says that he needs the money as his girlfriend is pregnant.