Big Yin (Scots words for big one) is the fourth episode of the third series of Still Game.
| Series Name | |
| Season 3, Episode 4 | |
 | |
| Air date | 28 May 2004 |
| Written by | Ford Kiernan and Greg Hemphill |
| Directed by | Michael Hines |
| Episode Guide | |
| previous Cairds |
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Plot[]
The episode opens with Navid's shop being robbed by some neds. Recently, the neds have been causing a lot of trouble for the residents of Craiglang. Jack and Victor have noticed the graffiti in the lift of Osprey Heights spelling CYT, the acronym for Craiglang Young Team, the local gang.
Meanwhile, Winston has applied for a job at Food Fare. He is doing this because he is too fond of the pub and the bookies and is struggling to survive on the pension he receives. Fortunately, he is taken on.
Jack and Victor scold a gang of neds for spray painting, but all they get for their trouble is their coats sprayed. They both have tits (breasts) painted on their coats. Boaby cannot help but laugh at Jack and Victor, but he admits that the neds have been too much for him too, threatening to sell up and move away if it gets worse. After a policeman comes in with his cap badge spray-painted and wanting to use the phone, Eric comments that the trouble wouldn't be going on if Innes was still there. Jack and Victor remember their old friend 'Big' Innes, a large man who wouldn't accept any nonsense, who left Craiglang fifteen years prior. Eric tells them that Innes now lives at a croft in Elgin. Jack phones Innes using the Clansman's phone, and Innes' wife answers the phone. She allows Innes to come to Craiglang on the promise that he is not to drink Midori, which has a strange effect on him.
At Food Fare, Winston is being bullied by a young man named Kevin for being old. Kevin taunts Winston for struggling with the trollies and thinks it's "boggin" for an old man to be working in a supermarket. Winston tries his best to ignore Kevin.
Navid has a new electronic door sensor installed in order to alert him of people entering the shop. Jack and Victor tell Navid that help is on its way in the form of Big Innes. Navid is impressed. Jack and Victor make a point of buying Navid's only bottle of Midori to prevent Innes from drinking it; they get it, much to Navid's joy, as the bottle is very old and dusty.
That evening, Innes arrives in Craiglang at the train station. Jack allows Innes to stay at his apartment and takes him to the pub, where he is welcomed by Victor and Eric. Boaby is amazed at how tall Innes is, and has prepared him four pints, as he can drink that much in one go. Innes asks for Midori, but Boaby says he has none left; Victor had taken Boaby's Midori, saying that Innes likes it, but cannot drink it due to a (fake) allergy. Just then, a ned comes in and goes to the toilet. Boaby orders him out, but the ned just insults him, goes to the toilet and tries to pilfer from the condom machine. Innes has a word with the ned, and the ned faints at the sight of Innes.
Next morning, Jack is showing Victor how much food Innes is eating. He has eaten a whole loaf of bread - half in sandwiches and the other half toasted. Also, Innes has eaten eight eggs like Smarties. Innes is then seen eating a whole box of Cornflakes with two pints of milk from a soup pot with a serving spoon. Victor laughs at Innes' eating habits.
Winston is still being bullied by Kevin down at Food Fare. An elderly worker, named Andy, speaks to Winston and advises him to be friendly with Kevin and then take him down, recalling how he took the blame after Kevin accidentally switched a fridge in the store, which resulting in Kevin leaving Andy alone ever since. Winston believes Andy is mad.
Jack and Victor confront Fergie, the ned who spray-painted them earlier. Innes picks up Fergie and throws him in a skip. A montage is shown of Innes rounding up the neds from Craiglang and sorting them out. After a few days, the neds run for cover and Innes is victorious. Craiglang is then shown to be nice and peaceful again.
Navid comments to Jack and Victor of how well Innes has done. He teases them that he told Innes that the bottle of Midori from his shop is hiding under Jack's bed.
Innes helps Isa to move her new cooker into her house. He even throws out Isa's old cooker into the skip below.
Things have come to a showdown between Winston and Kevin over the pricing guns. Winston thinks he has beaten Kevin, but Kevin has the last laugh as Winston has just stamped tins of sweetcorn with a £9.99 pricing sticker. Andy says that Kevin is making Winston his bitch, only to get headbutted by an annoyed Winston.
At Jack's house, Jack is cooking a massive steak for Innes as a thank-you dinner for his good work. Jack tells Victor to get rid of the bottle of Midori. They look through the peephole and see Innes going into the lift. Victor hides the Midori bottle in the plastic plant in the landing. Just then, Isa screams in horror as Innes has left a giant tower of poo in her toilet. She takes Domestos toilet cleaner to get rid of it and tells Jack and Victor that Innes went to Food Fare for Midori.
Jack and Victor race to Food Fare in a taxi, narrowly beating Innes there, but leave the dusty Midori bottle on the landing table at Osprey Heights. With Winston's help, they put all the bottles of Midori in a trolley and hide the trolley in the store room, while Winston distracts Innes. Despite having a built-in Midori detector, Innes leaves the shop empty-handed. Kevin insults the three OAPs, but by now, Winston has had enough and punches Kevin in the face. Winston promptly resigns. Andy expresses joy at Kevin's defeat.
Isa meets Innes in the pub and unwittingly gives him Jack's bottle of Midori, which Innes downs in one.
Jack and Victor tell Winston how well Innes has done cleaning up the town. They go into the pub to find the place in a mess. Nearly everyone is injured with Isa tending to their wounds and Innes is fast asleep on the floor. Jack and Victor suss that it was Midori, which Isa confirms.
After the credits roll, Innes is going back home to Elgin on the train. Innes is talking to an old lady about visiting his friends in Craiglang, but admits that he might have "outstayed his welcome". A man comes with a drinks trolley and offers Innes drinks such as Vodka, Gin, Whiskey and Midori and the camera pans in on Innes' eye, hinting at a further 'incident'.